My team leader was talking about the increase in electricity charges to me earlier today. Then she asked if things at home are all ok. To narrow it down, she ask if my stepmother is doing ok. OK as in no tantrums, no screaming, no attitude problems, no MONEY issues etc...

And so I started whining and complaining about how my stepmother handles her everyday life as a whole. No doubt that I don't spend much time with her (I dun see why I should...since we can't get along well...), but nevertheless, somehow I know her inside outside left and right. I don' t deny that she has her good traits. She cooks well and she keeps the house clean (OVER-clean). But other than that, I don't see any single good thing in her. Nevernind if she can't be nice to me coz I'm not hard up for it, but at the very least, she could be nice to my father. She could do her job as a wife and serve my father. Not forgetting lil Asmah also. Nie tidak, its like my father playing the wife role and she, the husband role. WTF lah kan?

To me, she is a two-headed snake. To the naked eyes, people may think she is nice, yeah hell she is nice to neighbours, her friends and her friends' friends. But within our own family, how nice can she be? I know its not nice of me to be talking about my domestic affairs here but on the whole, I'm just talking about the kind of stepmother I have. I just have to let it out somewhere and blogging seems to be the cure for it.

Money is the root to all problems - right? Because of money, even blood relations can be severed, marriage broken, family separated etc. So this is the blardy big problem I have with my stepmother. Kalau ikot cakap jahat - "Nanti kau mati aku tanam kau dengan duit!" But that's sounds too harsh aite? Then again, if a person is angry, anything can come out from their mouth.

Money is never enough for her. No matter how much. She thinks we all in Singapore print money on our own. She thinks money is easily earned. Even a prostitute finds it hard to earn money nowadays, right? *thinks*. But to her, money comes easy. Why? Because my poor daddy'O works day and night and when he gets the paycheck, he will give it all. And why again you may ask - because daddy'O don't have to fork out a single cent on the domestic bills plus its the only way to keep the stepmother out of the HAZARD ZONE which is as I have mentioned earlier : NO tantrums, NO screaming, NO attitude problems, NO MONEY issues. House loan, water/electric bills and other miscellaneous charges are all paid for already - by yours truly - ME lah. So I also work my ass in and out every day what.

It's been 13 long years since I have been tolerating this. Me and daddy'O have tried so many ways to help her change and to try and make her understand that money doesn't come easy. Especially in Singapore. We need to be thrifty and know how to manage our financial status. But she took it w/o any seriousness at all. Kes macam ungkal lazi gitu la. Masok telinga kiri keluar telinga kanan. She takes everything for granted. To sum it all up - she forgot where she came from. She isn't thankful to her benefactors. Worst still, she is not even thankful to Allah. Susah datang lah macam nie. I see daddy'O, I heart pain you know! *sobs*

I guess I have said much. No amount of my whinings or complains will bring about any changes. All I can do everyday is to pray to Allah to give me and daddy'O the faith and strength to live on each day with a human like her. Coz I believe, her presence in my family is too a challenge from HIM. Perhaps it may serve some kinda purpose. A learning journey...

My whinings end here. It's the weekend again and as usual, work needs to be done. You all have a fantabolous weekend hor!

:: Thought of the day ::
"Maybe all one can do is hope to end up with the right regrets.